


Can you hold me?

by Bxanie



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival (Video Game), Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Bullying, F/F, Happy birth Kanan, Insecurity, This is a little late, better late than never!, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-16 11:26:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13635339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bxanie/pseuds/Bxanie
Summary: It's Kanan's birthday and Ruby is rather nervous about giving Kanan her gift. When she finally gathers up the courage to do it, things take a turn for the worst...... or the best?





	Can you hold me?

Ruby never really knew how to approach Kanan, sure they had been friends since childhood, but in school, she seemed like an entirely different person. Perhaps it wasn’t really her, but the people surrounding her that were different. Instead of Kanan’s usual friend group, there were girls that Ruby never even noticed before. They made a circle around Kanan’s desk, making it unapproachable by anyone else. 

Ruby’s hands were trembling, and the dolphin plush within her tiny arms almost fell to the ground because of it. She pushed it closer to her chest and slowly took steps back, out of the classroom. She wanted to disappear into the ground, her gifts were nothing compared to the gifts already covering Kanan’s desk - She was nothing compared to the girls surrounding Kanan. 

Ruby walked backward more, with the intention of disappearing into the hall without Kanan noticing she had ever been there. Things didn’t go according to plan, she stepped right onto the foot of one of Kanan’s classmates in her carelessness. She turned to look at the girl behind her, who instantly made a remark on the item in her hands. 

“Ah. Kurosawa-san? Is that for Kanan-chan?” 

The girl took the plush dolphin from her arms and gave it a good squeeze, a disapproving grin on her features. 

“It looks kind of pathetic, don’t you think? I mean, the quality is really low and it doesn’t even feel fluffy. This isn’t worth her time.” Ruby felt like she could just burst out into tears right there. She quickly snatched the dolphin back from the girl's arms and clutched it to her chest, protecting it with her life. “I-I’ll go now.”

“I mean you can’t possibly think Kanan-chan will like this, right?” 

Ruby couldn’t take it anymore, her breathing quickened and she felt her heartbeat raise. Just as she was about to sink down onto the ground and become a ball of tears, she heard a loud voice breaking up their fight, or rather, the bullying that Ruby was enduring. 

“Ruby-chan! What’s going on here?! Natsuki, what the hell are you doing?!?” Ruby could hear Kanan’s voice calling out to both of the girls, but she didn’t care. It hurt - her heart hurt. She turned around completely, pushing past Kanan’s awful classmate, and running to the nearest bathroom down the hall. She pushed into the closest stall in a hurry and locked it behind her. She sank down against the stall door and let the tears that had threatened the corners of her eyes earlier slip out. 

She knew she was just being silly. She knew Kanan probably didn’t care about those girls. All of this, however, had been bugging Ruby for a long time. The way Chika and You looked at Kanan....the way Mari looked at Kanan…..the way her sister looked at Kanan. It hurt. She wanted to be the only one in Kanan's world, that's why it all hurt so much. Her poor little heart felt like it was being squished every time Kanan was surrounded by other girls. How could she possibly find a way inside of her heart when she had so many people already occupying it? And then there was that awful girl that had called the gift she had made for Kanan awful. She had made it herself too! She felt her heart sink down into her stomach, being burned by the acid from the inside. She began to feel incredibly nauseous and dizzy, she wanted to sink into the abyss and vanish forever.

She bawled her eyes out in the stall, only stopping whenever she heard someone enter the bathroom. The bell had already rang twice, and her sister was probably looking for her by now, but she couldn't stop crying. It hurt- it hurt so fucking much. 

Eventually, she heard the bathroom door open and once again, she held her breath to not cause suspicion. However, she never heard the stall door beside her open. She heard some rustling on the other side of her stall, with footsteps coming closer and closer to her. Then, she heard someone kneel down and Ruby knew she had been found out. Her sister always did know her hiding spots….

“Ruby-chan, will you come out? I know you’re in there.” 

Ruby nearly had a heart attack. That wasn’t Dia’s voice, it was Kanan’s. 

Ruby didn’t want to come out, however. She looked like a mess while holding the tear-stained dolphin plush that was supposed to be Kanan’s present but was just serving as a napkin at this point. Her eyes were probably a dark red too. No, she didn’t want to come out at all, but she couldn’t exactly stay inside the stall either when Kanan knew where she was. 

Reluctantly, Ruby rose to her feet and wiped her eyes. She pushed open the stall, her free hand still clutching the plush dolphin to her chest. She looked down at the ground so she would have to avoid Kanan’s gaze. 

“It’s okay Ruby-chan...let me take care of you. I got you”

She didn’t say anything when Kanan took her hand and took her to the entrance of the shoes. Ruby was still whimpering softly when the other girl changed her shoes and slowly pulled her outside. Kanan didn’t tell her where they were going, but it seemed like they wouldn’t be going back to class. One of Ruby’s hands was in Kanan’s, the other was still clutching the dolphin in her arms, holding onto as if it was her entire being. 

Kanan took Ruby home and wrapped her in a warm blanket on the couch, she turned the tv on then she disappeared into the kitchen. Seconds later she came back with a small bag of candies, which she popped open and placed it between them on the couch before sitting down and staring blankly at the tv. Ruby looked like a marshmallow with her cheeks full of candy and the blanket wrapped around her. It made her heart feel warm that Kanan was doing all of this for her - it made her feel calm, and her whimpering came to a stop. 

The situation they were in was a bit awkward though, and Ruby felt a bit guilty for ruining Kanan’s fun on her birthday. She moved the bag of candies and moved closer to Kanan until she could lean against her, like when they were kids. Kanan looked away from the tv, and instead, at Ruby who had settled against her arm. 

Kanan wrapped an arm around Ruby’s body instinctively and squeezed her slightly. The older girl nuzzled up to her and placed soft kisses on her cheek, which only caused Ruby’s heartbeat to increase more, but in a pleasant way, rather than a panicked way like before. Ruby knew Kanan only meant the kisses in a friendly manner, but it didn’t matter to her, she would take any form of affection Kanan would give her gladly. 

“Kanan-chan..?”

“Yes, Ruby-chan?” 

“I’m sorry for being such a weakling. I’m sure if I was a little stronger, like my sister, you could have had a lot of fun today. I'm sorry for ruining your birthday” Kanan's reaction was instant, she grabbed both of Ruby's cheeks quickly and turned her face to hers. Amethyst met emerald and Ruby wouldn’t mind getting lost in the night sky hidden in Kanan’s purple iris. 

“You’re not weak at all, and I don’t mind at all. I’d rather spend my birthday with you than those mean girls anyway. I love spending time with you, Ruby. You’re so important to me, you just don't realize it.” Kanan used her thumb to softly wipe away a tear that was leaking from Ruby’s eye. 

“Ruby, I love you, I have for a while. I couldn't be happier to spend time with you.” Kanan smiled softly at her, pressing their foreheads together. 

Ruby was a bit surprised at how confident Kanan had seemed, how sudden her confession was. She was shocked too, mouth agape as a soft gasp left it. Under her, however, she felt Kanan’s trembling hand take her own, indicating that she was quite nervous as well. 

“You’re not joking around, are you? You mean that, right?” 

Instead of answering Ruby, Kanan opted to lean in slowly. She laced their fingers together as their lips touched briefly, but the soft warmth of Kanan’s wet lips on her own was enough to raise Ruby’s body temperature and make the biggest grin form on her features. The two exchanged a look silently before pressing their foreheads together again. 

“Kanan-chan?” 

“Yes, Ruby-chan?” 

“Can you uh….I know everyone likes your hugs and I thought...can you hold me?” 

Silently, Kanan pulled Ruby closed and wrapped her arms around her instantly. Ruby felt tears threatening the corners of her eyes again, but she blinked them away. She was happy, Kanan wanted her, Kanan was in love with her. Kanan actually loved her. She didn’t need anything else. 

Yet, Ruby was still insecure about everything, about how the others would think of her as Kanan’s girlfriend or what Kanan’s mean classmate would do when she figured it out…

“Ruby, I love you…” Those words made Ruby’s worries wash away. As if Kanan was a hot wave taking her on a trip while enveloping her in love and warmth that she had never experienced before. A wave she didn’t want to leave, ever.

“I love you too,” Ruby said, wrapping her arms around Kanan and nuzzling into her soft skin. 

The candies that had been in Ruby’s lap laid forgotten on the carpet, next to a carefully crafted blue dolphin plush that Kanan would come to love and treasure for many years to come.

**Author's Note:**

> This was done very quickly, but I wanted to write something for Kanan's bday! I love you Kanan and I love some Kanawoobies too, so why not a kanawooby fic?
> 
> My tumblr is Kanabxanie and I'm open for requests!


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